Overview
In Romanian, naș (masculine) and nașă (feminine) are usually translated as "godfather" and "godmother" — but the word covers a relationship far larger and more binding than its English equivalent. A naș in Romania is not a ceremonial title given at a christening and forgotten. It is a lifelong contract between two families, often inherited across generations.
What a naș actually does
A Romanian usually has the same nași twice: first at botez (baptism), then again at cununie (the wedding). Frequently the wedding nași of the parents become the baptism nași of the child, knitting two families together across decades. The naș ține în brațe la botez — literally "holds in their arms at baptism" — meaning they hold the baby during the immersion, give the child a cruciuliță de aur (a small gold cross), and traditionally pay for the baptism celebration. At weddings, the nași stand beside the couple during the cununie, hold the crowns above their heads (cununiile), and are honoured at the reception as second only to the bride and groom.
The bond they form is finii–nași: the godchildren are the fini (sg. fin/fină), and the godparents are nașii. The relationship between the two sets of parents — the biological parents and the godparents — is called cumătrie, one of the oldest Romanian kinship words and one for which English has no equivalent. Cumătrul and cumătra (the two sides of the cumătrie pair) are expected to support each other through births, illnesses, weddings, and funerals. It is family by chosen alliance.
The weight of the obligation
Being asked to be a naș is a great honour and a near-impossible refusal. To say no, especially when asked by a close friend, can damage the friendship for years. To say yes is to commit to writing the largest cheque of the wedding, leading the procession, organising the post-wedding cumătrie gathering, and remaining a moral reference point for the couple for the rest of your life. In rural areas the obligations extend further: nași are expected at family illnesses, named as godparents to subsequent children, and consulted on serious decisions. "Nașul meu" (my godfather) is spoken with audible respect.
The Western godparent — a ceremonial title with no real obligations — would baffle a Romanian. So would the idea of having no nași at all. Until recently you could not get married in the Orthodox Church without nași, and even today the social pressure to find a pair is enormous. Couples without obvious nași sometimes ask older relatives, neighbours, or, increasingly, close friends roughly their own age — but the older, married, settled couple remains the ideal.
Key Romanian vocabulary
| Romanian | English | Usage note |
|---|---|---|
| naș / nașă (pl. nași) | godfather / godmother | Lifelong role, not ceremonial |
| fin / fină (pl. fini) | godchild | The other half of the bond |
| botez | baptism | Where the relationship usually begins |
| cumătrie | the godparent-parent relationship | No English equivalent |
| cruciuliță de aur | small gold cross | Traditional gift from naș at baptism |
| Nașul meu | "My godfather" | Spoken with respect, often in serious context |
What to know as a learner
Family vocabulary in Romanian is much richer than in English — cumnat/cumnată (brother-/sister-in-law), cuscru/cuscră (the relationship between two sets of in-laws), finii, nașii — and learning these labels is a quiet way to show you take the culture seriously. When a Romanian friend mentions their naș, do not collapse it into "godfather" in your head. Hear it as "the man who has been there since my baptism, who paid for my wedding, who I will call when my father dies." Then you will understand why nașul meu is said the way it is.